week six

_________________________________________

...someday the ice will melt to reveal its dead.

regan fred johnson

_________________________________________

they say that time plays upon the seasons with god at its helm
others say that winter's fate is controlled by a groundhog.
i'm going to go with my instincts on this one.
punxsutawney phil, you rascal you.

rich curtis

_________________________________________

dictionary.com blues, march 22-29

it is feckless to us to feign a velleity of meeting, continuously avoiding propinquity and pithy talk. osculation is its own thaumaturgy, and we are changed. get over it.

chris crosby

_________________________________________

indie

the new vintage is 'future'...
american apparel is the future abercrombie & fitch...hipsters are beggining to scoff...
anorexic is the new indie...
bi is the new indie...
making fun of indie is the new indie.

erik fullmer

_________________________________________

dear conceited coworker,

just because i called you out on being an obvious creep who does chin-ups in our office doorways, eats nothing but eggwhites, color codes his work-out work attire (i believe today is purple?), and hits on every person with boobs in this office, does not mean that you have to cry in your pants and ignore me. or maybe it does. i don't really miss your one-liners.

sincerely,

anonymous

_________________________________________

i wonder who decided that those big inflatable balloons that don't really resemble humans "dancing" were genius marketing tools.
i wonder how much of a car dealership's budget is devoted to them. i wonder how much money any one person has made off of them. seriously.

sara thomas

_________________________________________

one call, that's all

once a week i end up in the bathroom in the middle of the night
on the phone
with my attorney
and i'm like, "i'll sue you."
and he's all like, "you can't sue me. i'm your father."
and i'm all like, "well then give me back my childhood!"
and then he reminds me that he was a stay at home dad and we did everything together while i was growing up
and when i get off the phone
i go back to bed, but it's not the same
cause i can't seem to find that comfortable spot i was in
before i needed to make that phone call
and the drool on my pillow case
is already cold and gross to lay on.
i miss college.

chris duce

_________________________________________

homage to the dubious

exogenous, androgynous me.
the hair in the sink alone is self-evident.
"of what?"
get over yourself. you're just a hoax, your wit
an insidious malady.
remember that rather poignant slap in the face?
your own brother.
"i detest all that is paltry, all that is cruel."
just how auspicious or ominous were the tears?
through osmosis
i've become what i hate.
i don't need another remedy.
don't cure me.
there is no paragon,
no panacea.
i need no savior, no rescue boat.
the storm is never as voracious
as its campaign declares.
"and if?"
if i drown before i wake, i pray the lord
my soul to.. to..
to free.

ricky cheney

_________________________________________

yeah right

lauren swainston

_________________________________________

whatever

colin pinegar

_________________________________________

this week; or, the anti-cancun

5 days of school
workworkwork
7 hour mcat prep class
no babes
spring break '09!!!!!!!


it ended quietly

he always imagined saying something memorable at the end,
something that his children would carry with them
and repeat to their children in a bedside moment.

but instead, the last thing he did before he died
was notice the leaves outside his window,
and how when the wind blew

they would cross back and forth over a beam of light
that hit his wall through a slit in the curtain
and make a bright spot fade in and out.

"it's like morse code,"
he thought to himself...


two new haikus for you

visit

why are you surprised?
i've been talking of coming.
well, never out loud...


first thing

save some juice for me -
i need it in the morning
to kill the sleep taste.

austinrory hackett

_________________________________________

miss spelled

i am lying here in beded in my pillows.
i think i sea a see monster.
here it? their it is, the water.
ewe, just missed her tale.
know, i was wrong.
you aren't hear.
no eye
can't see i
lost what i had with you.
you tolled me
no, your leaving.
now. i'm back.
and see monsters.
i maid it up.
to get you to
here.
to sea.
that i like
you steal
my heart.
this is what i put myself
threw out the night.
tired of playing this
role over and try to sleep.

aly cain

_________________________________________

week five

_________________________________________

minor course corrections

perhaps there are some things better left unsaid.
"i have to paint you" is one of them.


systemic symphony

oh what spirit of anatomic vernacular!
nervous and his wit!
cardiovascular, oh what rhythm!
pituitary and her dews from heaven!
skeletal, what poise!
muscular, etched from the artisan's chisel!
integumentary and its legions of follicles!
lymphatic, less known but still very important
and digestive.... oh digestive
the ugly duckling that brings energy to all!

rich curtis

_________________________________________

palinopsia; or, i have worm poison in my brain

a worm put a toxin on my optic nerve -
which really is not much trouble,
cuz instead of hurting some crucial bit,
it just makes me see things double.

each stimulus that hits my eye
sends two signals to my brain.
the second is much weaker, though -
its image is rather faint.

it doesn't bother me any more,
(my worm-induced mind antic)
and in fact i've come to realize
that it can be romantic.

cuz when you walk by a normal guy
his one look must suffice,
but when your face crosses my view,
i get to see it twice.

austinrory hackett

editor's note: i really did get palinopsia in paraguay, and will have it my whole life

_________________________________________

involuntary assisted suicide

driving down the highway
good music and my mom's car
someone following too close.
there is something in my lane.
a quail.
it's a quail.
i think he is staring at me.
walking towards me. why?
move. please move.
i knew it was either his tail
or mine.
i used to think that fingernails
on a chalkboard was the worst sound.
not anymore.

aly cain

_________________________________________

i would give the world

neruda and saadi
to melt an angry heart

lindsay lark
to show a genuine soul

rock 'n roll
to displace restless fear


a silly love poem

they saw each other in a small cafe,
she sketched his image and he looked away.
her strokes 'came more desperate,
and he less perceptive,
as she loved from afar
and he kept it at bay.

jana kopeinig

_________________________________________

i have a.d.d.

email sarah about cd...
get distracted with email from sister...
post a comment on family blog while at it...
read the elite no-caps writing blog...
look up the meaning of coagulation...
re-read austin's email...
make first post on elite no-caps writing blog...
go back to finishing email to sarah about cd two hours later.

bianca merkley

_________________________________________

more

recently i have wanted to pray more.
not just more often but more deeply.
more heartfelt.
more of me.

so i was praying and praying -
releasing all of my thoughts in my head.
the ones that had been there for a long time and the ones
that had just arrived.

and i was praying and praying
and it felt so good.
then before i could stop myself,
i said the word "damn"

and i stopped.
and i was quiet.
then i kept praying because i knew
god was still listening

megan morton

_________________________________________

two ships, it's dark

it's a grip of one side
and a single mind refuses
to aim for balance
and as these ships pass in the dark
the weight of one side causes us to sink
and we look up with hateful eyes
waving a fist full of disgust
and before we realize we're dead
we remember how right we are.
so our refusal to meditate
and our persistence of hate
will not be a legacy remembered,
but just another
sunken ship forgotten on the ocean floor.

erik fullmer

_________________________________________

kitty glitter

right now i'm in vegas
but i forgot to bring a shirt
so none of these damn buffets will serve me
but the women will.
i'm the sexiest thing in vegas.










chris duce

_________________________________________

as a fan of the biggest loser, i wonder if these enormously obese people really understand what they are doing. in the course of a few months they divide their person by 3. in other words, what was once three people is now one person. i wonder if they have phantom limb syndrome where they go to scratch a portion of their abdomen and it's not there anymore.

dave anderson

_________________________________________

when i'm at work, i often say out loud, "i'm going to shoot myself in the head." when i said it today i realized how gross that would be. really messy.

when i go in public bathrooms and there is someone sitting in their stall waiting for me to leave so they can poop alone i want to say, "listen, i don't mind if i hear you poop. everyone poops." but instead i just take my dear sweet time so they have to hold it even longer.

i watched man on wire. i think phillipe petit is an arrogant butthole. i just looked up how to spell arrogant.

anonymous

_________________________________________

laziness: a case study

human hungers

human approaches large plastic bag full of rolls

human observes separation between hand and roll by plastic

human perceives twist tie concealment device

human contemplates intellectual and temporal sacrifice of operating and conquering intricate twist tie concealment device

human alternatively impales plastic bag with fist

human retrieves roll

human rejoices

bradley call barth

_________________________________________

i have never wanted something so bad
and been so far away from having it

++anonymous++

_________________________________________

jimminy cricket

i'd like to think
that everything happens for a reason

that serendipity is a true principle

that love at first sight
isn't something people lie about

that angels do get their wings
at the sound of a bell

that when someone says, i love you,
they really do

that my dreams tell the future

that eyelashes, wishing well pennies,
birthday candles, first star i see tonight,
really grant wishes

that fairies die
when someone stops believing

i'd like to believe
but i've recently stepped on my cricket

trav clark

_________________________________________

communication is contingent upon branching these empty/full expanses through words or physical projections.

lauren swainston

_________________________________________

puddle of love

one year i never missed a single day of school.
on wet days we feared the dangerous tricking pools.
so class stayed in and we sat on our floor,
silently tossed a ball while outside it poured.

on the bus ride home i sat behind my crush
enjoying the storm, watching the grass turn to mush
i opened the window and she started to laugh
as water squeezed through the crack and pelted my lap.

i smiled while the bus gracefully slid to my stop
there my brother waited to save me from the drops.
my friends ran with backpacks over their heads
as my brother started the car, turned to me and said...

watch this.

the car took off before i could buckle
my brother grinned and aimed for the puddle.
my poor little heart broke knowing i could not save
my one true love from a tidal wave.

myron nilsson

_________________________________________

footloose. 2009 for all you suckas

this week
i longed for a peek
at what is ahead,
spent too little time in bed.
celebrated my heritage with a keg,
of which we're still polishing off the dregs
(this is the remix y'all, this is the remix)
ate overrated pizza friday, and that's about it,
saturday dropped fire down a bottomless pit,
(ooooh shorty, drop it like fire down a bottomless pit, shorty)

chris crosby

_________________________________________

usurp and abdicate

we's can't pay no risin' mortgage
we ain't gunna toil n'more
we don't understand no credit, no numbers, no recession
we does understands dat we wurk!
ya they's got figures in accounts n' fast cars,
well we's got's numbers. we is numbers!
we's fast too n'stronga den dollas.
we's jus' waitin fur wall street tuh burn,
we's waitin fur their accounts tuh drain.
we's ain't gunna rule aftuh
we ain't no vanguard
we's not elite
we is you.
we's gunna take power then deestroy it.
we's all really duh same ya know,
we is just you.


euphemism isms

i'll trade you one
capitalism and one neo-liberalism
for one real-equal-opportunity-ism
and one feed-the-whole-world-ism.
deal?

ricky cheney

_________________________________________

week four

_________________________________________

(1) notification

no new friend
not a tagged photo
no group or party invite
one new message.

today facebook told me that my friend had died.
and this time there was no decline button.

megan morton

________________________________________

frustration

around around in circles it goes.
an outward expression of inner discontent.
giving the tip a lick might do the trick
but the empty circles continue.
my frenzied wrist could use a rest
and while cursing bic i must attest
that this pen sucks!

richard curtis

________________________________________

haiku pick-up lines

i have the high score
on all my friends' iphone games.
you wanna go out?


i guarantee that
i'm better than your boyfriend
at everything.


hey - you're that one girl
i follow ev'ry tuesday
between my classes.


hello. my name is
austin and i'm pretty sure
you have the best face.


i already know
ev'rything you like to do.
i facebooklove you.

austinrory hackett

________________________________________























brad barth

________________________________________

addiction

not to be aided but i'm dependent
not to be able to break away from these carcinogens
something is beating in my body
and my clock says it's time
in the night is when i'm vulnerable
in the dark is when i trip
and i don't know when this fall will end.

erik fullmer

________________________________________

chase mcmillan has a funny name

ace mc-killin', star ship commander,
space mc-thrillin' cosmic ladies,
sack rac on the mc-hillin'
disgraced by mc-pill-poppin,
base mc-stealin'
mason jar mc-dill picklin'

chris crosby

________________________________________

of a certian age

i contemplate my situation
how better to describe - stagnation or coagulation?

experience and daydreams slow down
still here, but few and farther between

sara thomas

________________________________________
















rory bruggeman

________________________________________

i've started trying to convince some people that post postings in the missed connections on craigslist that i'm their actual missed connection... it's kind of boring... people aren't as open to their posts being open to interpretation as one might expect.

mainly i just have fun googling them and seeing what type of person actually postst there... in case you're wondering what type of person does post on the missed connections, it's this type of person: http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0769901/

i briefly considered asking her for a job.

dane cannon

________________________________________

memory-ism

my roommate has a clock
on which is engraved,
life is not measured by minutes,
but by memories.

this is offensive to old human beings
who have a lot of minutes
under their belt
but struggle with memory.

be more sensitive.
bigot.
xenophobe.
memory-ist!

ricky cheney

________________________________________

2 months 2 go

two of my best friends are getting married
and one of them has been doing a lot of sit-ups
so that he can be really buff for his wedding night.
little does he know that his fiance likes a little bit
of a chubby stomach
and each sit up buries him even deeper
in a hole of disappointment
and a lot of dvd watching
on their honeymoon.

chris duce

________________________________________

mushrash
mustache
must stash
mus tash
my stash
musk ash

mustachio

++anonymous++

________________________________________

week three

_________________________________________

sometimes you reach in
expecting a gummie bear
but get a skittle

eleanor kramer

_________________________________________






















jana kopeinig

_________________________________________

watch guys

what if the movie watchmen was
just about two jehova's witness missionaries
who get captured by a vietnamese gang
and teach themselves martial arts
in order to fight them
and escape?

chris duce

_________________________________________

the past

history.
his-story.
i want her story.


un charter

if we furled one another's fur
to reconcile conflicts,
like primates,
we'd be at peace.


student "politics"

i got offered to get "smoked out"
to vote for a party. they were also cooking flesh
on a grill
for free.
free meat and weed? count me in!

ricky cheney

_________________________________________

accomplishments in particular order

this week i:
made a new friend
didn't trim my own bangs
watched most of a basketball game
willingly consumed at least four zinc lozenges
played key role in gum ball/cupcake scenario
read the first chapter of a historical romance novel
decided what i want to be when i grow up
redeemed myself for aforesaid reading material by finishing truman capote "novel"
brought my love of all things kelly clarkson out in the open

sara thomas

_________________________________________

writer's block

poetry is........
is long........no wait
poetry is........
is hard........no.....
poetry is........
is useless.....maybe
poetry is........
is without.....not really
poetry is........
is inspired......close
poetry is........
is thought.......wait
poetry is.......................eureka!
poetry is long, hard, and useless without inspired thought.

rich curtis

_________________________________________

cinquains - cinco of them


hate

here are
some things i hate:
your answering machine,
bands that rhyme with ickleback,
whole milk.


cling on this

star trek
for some people
is way better than friends,
dating, college, hygiene, life, and
star wars.


nighttime

sleeping -
that special time
when you are paralyzed,
helpless and hallucinating......
sweet dreams.


just go

cross walks
give me power.
i want to go - you'll stop.
i'm not even gonna look up -
deal with't.


(+)

protons
in solution
binding with anything -
tossed from one acid to the next.
what sluts.

austinrory hackett

_________________________________________

i just gotta be mE!

dane cannon

__________________________________________

mexico

i give you good price, one dollar
it's real silver... no? ok, maybe not
nobody buys this @#%! anyway
what i'm really selling is pot

carter nelson

__________________________________________

ode

with you,
i dreamed of going to the zoo
maybe even entering the wu

you taught me to shimmy
shimmy ya, yam, yea
and get that cream night n' day

you've gone the way of the earth
but i still remember dirt mcgirt

...or should i say big baby jesus
either way

r.i.p. o.d.b

breanne chipman

__________________________________________

i've been thinking a lot about what to write over the past couple weeks. i didn't submit anything because nothing really came to mind. i thought that maybe it should be something funny. i thought that maybe it should be about one of the many heartaches. i thought that maybe it needed to be really creative. i thought that maybe it should be about the scared and anxious anxieties that most of us are probably feeling about one or more aspects of our lives. i thought that maybe i could just write down song lyrics that convey the feelings i have better than i can. etc etc. the more i thought about it, the more none of these things seemed like a good idea. maybe next week.

for now, i think i'm supposed to worry a little more about everyone else, and a little less about myself.

++anonymous++

__________________________________________

misfits post-danzig.
henry rollins in black flag.
march, two-thousand nine.

colin pinegar

__________________________________________
















rory bruggeman

__________________________________________